Friday, November 21, 2003

It's All About Me:
For my best friend Scott Allen, who set himself free two years ago 11/23. I thought it was the 21st because it was the Friday after Thanksgiving. (but perhaps it was the Saturday, nobody knows for sure when it was) I just know that this is the time-frame of the week; a "Good Friday" if you will.

I miss you now, I will miss you forever. I'm grateful today for the time we had together- the laughter, the truimphs, even the tears. Thank you for listening, for pulling me through some of my darkest hours, for celebrating with me some of my brighest ones. Thank you for your honesty, for telling me that I was being an idiot when I was being self-defeating, for giving me confidence in myself when I was faced with crippling self-doubt. For listening to endless hours of talk. For telling me that I was beautiful. For all that you gave to me. I was truly blessed. The tears I cry today are ones of pure selfishness for what I lost.

I hope that you are happy and free, that your beautiful soul lives on in a place where no pain or sorrow can touch it, where understanding and love are the order of the day, and the answers we all desperately crave are made available to us. If there is a reason to believe in heaven, it is so I can see you once again.

Thank you Scott. You will always be in my heart.